We give, and we take. For some people, it’s a job, and they get paid a salary for it. But for a billion others, it’s a responsibility. There are somethings that can’t be put a value to for example relationships like parent to child, teacher to student, sponsor to organizer, hairdresser to regular customer. There are some things that we give, in small or large amounts, over a period of time, becomes a mountain of contributions, influencing change, whether positive or negative. We, as humans (not to mention as Malays) often want it back, in the form of a handshake, utmost loyalty and most of the time, credit. Ever so frequent, you will hear about a person being ungrateful to somebody you know, and you understand that this is wrong. It is because you were brought up in a background that educates you to claim credit wherever you have contributed. I want to tell you that you are wrong.

There is a celestial responsibility in all of us. We were made who we are, the people around us were placed there, the things we choose to do in life are such because He has planned for it to be that way. We play multiple roles to the people around us, and the people we meet, whether we get paid for it, or we are kissed on the hand frequently for. We share what we have because it is only correct. We give the little that we have because we will get it back from elsewhere. We tell the people around us about the things we like to eat, people we like, places we’ve been to, because if they feel the same way, we will have more things in common and if we don’t feel the same way, we would have something to argue about. We teach our juniors because we don’t want them to repeat our mistakes. We play our part so that they can play their parts too later.

However, reciprocity is scientific, it is not a physical matter. It is not something we can ask for in return. We must stop taking credit for the recipes we’ve given, we cannot hold our children from living their lives just because we feel that way, we cannot say we paid for it when things go wrong because it will only make us look bad and make them feel bad. It is really not our place to judge others in the time when we really want to say “I hate you for doing this”. We do not own anything other than what is rightfully ours, that is mind, body and soul. Intellectual property is an entirely different matter. But if we claim credit, honours and attention for something that does not permit our names to be imprinted there, then it is not meant for us to claim as ours, in the first place.

You must stop believing that you contributed enough to warrant yourself a special mention. It is not appropriate to think that way. You contributed because you simply did. You will get your thank you in another manner. I’m very sure of that. You give, and groom your child, but the child is not colouring book. He has his own colours. So do you. Don’t let anybody tell you they gave you your colours when they merely just gave you colouring pencils.